From fox to teddy bear

When I first started at my current workplace, I did the Mouton-Blake Conflict Management Style Assessment, the animal version (but we used ostrich instead of turtle). I was a fox:

Foxes use a compromising conflict management style; concern is for goals and relationships

Foxes are willing to sacrifice some of their goals while persuading others to give up part of theirs

Compromise is assertive and cooperative-result is either win-lose or lose-lose

Advantage: relationships are maintained and conflicts are removed

Disadvantage: compromise may create less than ideal outcome and game playing can result

Appropriate times to use a Fox style

• When important/complex issues leave no clear or simple solutions
• When all conflicting people are equal in power and have strong interests in different solutions
• When their are no time restraints

I must admit, I was surpised at being a fox. Perhaps I was deluding myself. Then again, I had just started a new job which I was enjoying, so I was probably feeling quite confident in my own abilities at the time.

The other month [it was the other day when I originally drafted this post], I did the test again as part of the aforementioned management training course. This time I was a teddy bear:

Teddy bears use a smoothing or accommodating conflict management style with emphasis on human relationships

Teddy bears ignore their own goals and resolve conflict by giving into others; unassertive and cooperative creating a win-lose (bear is loser) situation

Advantage: Accommodating maintains relationships

Disadvantage: Giving in may not be productive, bear may be taken advantage of

Appropriate times to use a Teddy Bear style

• When maintaining the relationship outweighs other considerations
• When suggestions/changes are not important to the accommodator
• When minimizing losses in situations where outmatched or losing
• When time is limited or when harmony and stability are valued

So how did I change from a fox to a teddy bear (assuming I ever really was a fox in the first place)? My line manager has asked me to think about this, so I am. See, I do what I’m told, like a good, cooperative teddy bear.

Well, a lot has happened in four and a half years. There have been some very difficult times, both professionally and personally. People say that difficult things get better the more you do them. This may be the case for some people in some situations, but for me trying to do my job this hasn’t been the case. The difficult situations I have to deal with, the less confident and more unassertive I feel, and my behaviour reflects this. I’m sure all of this  has contributed to my current status as a teddy bear and it is not good.

If anyone knows of any jobs suitable for teddy bears please let  me know.

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