I thought I was pretty good at feeling bad about stuff before, but since I became a parent I’ve entered a whole new world of guilty feelings! Yay! Here are a few things I’ve felt guilty about in the past week or so:
- Putting B in nursery
- Going out for drinks
- Reading in the bath
- Going to choir practice
- ‘Making’ fish fingers and chips for tea again
It seems that extra guilt (or rather feelings of guilt) comes with the territory of being a parent, perhaps especially when we’re still relatively new to the job (although I suspect it doesn’t get much better later on either). I don’t think there’s much to be done about it, except to try to remember that B is perfectly fine if one or other of us isn’t there, or if neither of us is there and she’s being looked after by someone else for a while (e.g. at nursery) and it’s OK to do nice things for ourselves otherwise we would be exhausted robots and no good to anyone, least of all a small child, and fish fingers and chips are not that bad for you, especially if served with peas (right?).
But of course this is easier said than done when (e.g.) you see (and, worse, hear) your baby looking through
the bars of baby prison the baby-gate on the nursery room door and wailing piteously. B is, according to her nursery record book, getting on very well – after we’ve gone! She has been playing with new toys and meeting new people and trying new foods, and even sleeping a little bit in the day in a strange cot (which I’m quite surprised about as at home she will only stay asleep in the day if she’s on someone). Apparently she’s doing her usual thing of observing everyone and everything around her with great interest! So I think she is OK there, it’s just the being left at the beginning of the day she doesn’t like – and we don’t like leaving her – but hopefully it will get easier for all of us after a while.